Athor: psycholizard
Pairings: River/Jayne, Simon/Kaylee
Summary: Simon doesn't have a romantic bone in his body. Or does he? Kaylee is frustrated by the lack of romance in her life, or is she? River and Jayne become the unknowing targets of a convoluted and complicated matchmaking plan formulated by the people that know them best: Simon and Kaylee.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Never was. Never will be.
Simon stood alone in the med bay obsessively counting out his tools and organizing them on the tray. The Captain had just booked another job and if Simon was right, which he usually was, he would need all of his equipment to be in order and easily accessible as soon as the job was completed. He also needed time to think about the strange turn of events his life had taken.
Unfortunately, he was so caught up in what he was doing that he didn’t hear River pad silently into the infirmary, nor did he hear her approach him very quietly and stand behind him.
“What are you doing, Simon?” Simon jumped backwards at the sudden voice in his ear and clasped a hand over his chest in an overly dramatic fashion.
“Mei mei,” he said in a breathless voice. “You startled me.”
Rivers face broke out into a wide grin at his reaction before she quickly sobered. Simon noticed the sudden change immediately and moved closer to her.
“River, what’s wrong?” he asked. Tenderly, he reached out and brushed her hair out of her face. His fingertips brushed lightly across her cheeks and when he pulled his hand back, he saw that they were wet. Tilting her face up slightly, he noticed her eyes were bloodshot and her cheeks were moist.
“River, have you been crying?” A note of deep concern tinged Simon’s voice and his protective older brother nature began to emerge. River’s lower lip quivered and she took a shaky breath as she shook her head.
“No,” she said quietly, her eyes brimming with unshed tears and her nose red and runny. Ever since she was a child, River had never been able to hide her tears, especially from Simon. When they were younger, he would tease her and say that it was because she looked funny when she cried, like a puppy that someone had left out in the rain for too long. As they grew older, River took solace in the fact that her brother always knew when she was upset, even when their parents did not.
“River,” Simon replied affectionately. “I know when you’re upset and have been crying. Now tell me what’s bothering you.”
He gently took her hand and led her over to one of the metal stools standing in a corner to sit down. Pulling up another stool, he sat down across from her, gazing at her intently. River looked away, trying in to avoid his gaze, but all her attempts were in vain. With a move only a brother could pull off, Simon tilted her chin so she looked directly at him.
“Fine,” River crossed her arms with a huff and leaned as far back on the stool as she could without falling off.
“I saw Kaylee and Jayne sitting together in the engine room,” she sighed.
“And?” Simon prompted. River huffed in frustration and rolled her eyes. Honestly, her brother could be so thick in the skull sometimes.
“And they were talking,” she replied as though this were the most obvious thing in the ‘verse. Simon smiled to himself and tried, in vain, to contain a chuckle.
“Like we are now?”
“No! Not like we are now! Like fluff and cuddles and warm thoughts!” River knew she was babbling, it was a habit of hers when she became excessively frustrated like she was now.
“River, do you need me to get you anything?” Simon asked gently. River shook her head vigorously.
“No, no needles, no medicine,” she answered as she put her hands on either side of her head. Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes and breathed deeply, locating her inner place of calm. Within the span of a few minutes, during which Simon was seriously beginning to doubt his own sanity as well as his sister’s, River was able to find her place of zen and relax enough to tell her brother what was bothering her.
“Kaylee was sitting beside Jayne and he had his arm around her,” River finally managed to say. She was certain her brother would understand now and put a stop to the nonsense that was occurring on board this ship. He was after all her brother, and dense as he might be, he loved Kaylee. She was sure of it. Simon sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose.
“River I think there’s a bigger issue at hand here that we need to deal with,” Simon replied.
Maybe he didn’t love Kaylee as much as she thought he did.
“Were you spying on Kaylee in the engine room?” he asked. River raised an eyebrow and pursed her lip. Simon held in a smile at the indignant look she shot him.
“Not the point,” River replied as she folded her arms across her chest. Honestly, why couldn’t her brother just understand? He could be such a boob sometimes.
“No, I think that is the point, mei mei,” Simon answered. “Everyone has a right to privacy without having to worry about a certain impish little pilot crawling through the cooling ducts watching them.”
River fidgeted nervously while Simon continued his lecture.
“I know you’ve worked very hard to build and maintain your psychic boundaries during the past few months. I’m very proud of the control you’ve able to obtain. But you need to respect people’s physical privacy as well as their mental privacy. Did you eavesdrop on Kaylee’s and Jayne’s thoughts as well as their conversation?”
River rolled her eyes and sullenly shook her head.
“Mei mei, I’m touched that you’re taking this to heart,” Simon continued in a more tender tone of voice. “But Kaylee and I are adults. We can work through our own issues. I really don’t see what you’re so concerned about, but if it would make you feel better, I’ll go talk to Kaylee and see if there’s anything I need to be concerned about.”
River nodded silently while she played with the hem of her shirt.
“Alright,” Simon planted a kiss on her forehead as he stood to leave. “Now, no more spying, promise?” River nodded once and looked away as Simon left the medbay. He paused momentarily by the doorway and glanced back at her still sitting on the stool.
“Mei mei, are you certain of the reason you were bothered by what you saw?” he asked. River looked up at him and opened her mouth to speak, and then promptly shut it. Without waiting for her to answer, Simon left, leaving River alone to her thoughts once again.
*****
On the other side of the ship, Jayne Cobb was also alone with his thoughts. Little Kaylee had left him a while ago to finish some repairs in the underbelly of the ship and seeing as Jayne had no desire to be in the area the septic tank was housed, he opted to stay above deck. He had wandered around the ship for a while, dropping by the cargo bay for a quick work out and the mess hall for a snack before he eventually wound up in his bunk. Unfortunately for him, time alone meant time to think and that meant thinking about her. The crazy psychic gun-toting genius of a pilot. Strange how his mind always seemed to wander back to her. It was like he was a gorram teenager again.
Sighing heavily, Jayne flopped down on his cot and stared up at the ceiling. He was more than fairly sure that River had been up in the cooling ducts during part of his conversation with Kaylee but he just wasn’t certain how long she had been there for.
Groaning, he rubbed his face with his hands. He definitely hoped she had missed the beginning of the conversation because that would be all sorts of embarrassing. Resting an arm on his forehead, he let out a low chuckle.
Girl was sneaky, that’s for sure. It wasn’t until he had sat down in the corner with Kaylee that he had spotted a pair of big brown eyes peering down from behind the grating. But since she hadn’t made her presence known, he hadn’t said anything. The whole time him and Kaylee chatted, he was aware of her presence, but if she knew it then she had didn’t show it. Instead, she stayed there for the duration of the conversation until Kaylee cuddled in close and he put an arm around her. Then the girl had left abruptly and that struck him as sort of odd. He was still mulling it over in his mind as to why she left so quickly, but he just couldn’t figure it out.
She knew he only thought of Kaylee as a sister, didn’t she? She was a mind reading genius after all, so she should know what he felt. He wasn’t used to dealing with psychics. Too much trouble to be worth it, in his opinion. There was never any privacy and your thoughts weren’t your own.
A brief thought flickered through his mind that he should just sit down and talk to her, but as soon as it came, it went. There was no way he was going to pour out his heart to l’il crazy. She’d probably tear a strip offa him. Either that or she’d go tell the Captain and her brother, who’d probably want to space him.
No. He would conquer this. He’d fight it and he’d beat it, just like he did with everything in his life. He was a mercenary after all, and mercenaries didn’t give in to their feelings.
They got rid of them.
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